Good News/Bad News

It’s Nice to be Important but more Important to be Nice

The Campaign Trudges Onward: A couple of characteristics have arisen during this presidential campaign which have shown some stark differences among the three candidates. The Senator from Arizona he presented a grandfatherly persona with a streak of orneriness. But he has at times unleashed vile comments toward his wife, his underlings, and even members of the press. Ok, maybe some of the members of the press deserved it. The Senator from New York has become a chameleon. She found her voice after one primary (after boasting of twelve years of serving her country she didn’t have a voice?), cried in an interview (that was a killer for Geraldine Ferraro but worked for Lady C.), belted down a shot and a beer, picked up her Jed Clampett gun, and made the NASCAR circuit. During that time she continued to squirt her same-party opponent with pepper-spray of vitriol. The Senator from Illinois seems to be running for Sainthood. His approach is to find logic and common ground rather than to wield a sword. While the Arizona senator takes a nap it seems like one or the other candidates has Karl Rove for a campaign manager and the other has Ghandi.

Democracy allows you to vote for who you like the least: One consequence of American Democracy is that each side tars the other side’s candidate with slime and mud. Karl Rove did not invent the technique, though he makes a good target to blame. The Republicans in the name of James Blaine in the 1800s used inflammatory comments alleging that candidate Grover Cleveland had fathered a son out of wedlock. The cry was, “Ma, Ma, where’s my Pa? Gone to the White House, ho, ha, ha.” Cleveland struck back with a lesser known quote, “James G. Blaine, The Continental Liar from the State of Maine.” That time the Repbs won the poetry contest but the Dems won the election.

Those Texans Do Everything Big: A Kentuckian was boasting to a Texan that there was enough gold in Fort Knox to build a fence around the entire state of Texas three feet high. The Texan responded, “Y’all go ahead and build yer fence and if we like it we’ll buy it.” The sinkhole in Texas is now over 250 feet deep and more than three football fields long! Maybe the entire state of Texas will sink in, or maybe it will swallow the polygamy compound. Things are big in Texas. But as the Alaskans were so proud of saying when they achieved statehood, “Little old Texas, we still love ya.”

From the Outhouse to the Penthouse: Carl Hunter was a good old boy but had been down on his luck since Katrina hit his home town. A construction worker, he lost his two-home investment to the floodwaters. He was busted, disgusted, his bank account encrusted. His wife asked him to run to the local convenience store for a quart of overpriced milk. He did and used the change to buy a Powerball lottery ticket. Good decision. Kaching! The ticket was worth $ 97 million. I just love happy endings.

A little blogging music Maestro... “Against All Odds” by Phil Collins.

Dr. Forgot

Money Makes the World Go Round

The Buck Doesn’t Even Slow Down Here

We Have All the Money We Need For Life: Provided we die tomorrow. When Europe first rolled out the Euro there were hues and cries that it was a mere pittance against the mighty Dollar. At one point it was worth around 80 cents. My how the worm, if not the Euro, has turned – it is now worth $ 1.60. That means it will cost $ 1.60 to buy one Euro. Since Euros are probably not the preferred currency in your neighborhood Wal-Mart, 99-cent store, or even Starbucks that economic fact might not make you quiver. The British Pound is worth nearly U.S. $ 2.00. If you’re planning a European trip, brace yourself.

Spiritual Fruits & Religious Nuts: The Pope is Roamin’ the streets of D.C. Papal representatives stress that this is not a political trip. Right! How many other dignitaries have been picked up at the airport by the President? The Pontiff’s visit to White House during the season of presidential campaigning has caused some pundits to wonder if the goal is to make His Holiness an honorary Republican. The so–called “Catholic vote” typically goes to the Democratic candidate. Some say the timing of the visit changes the White House motto from “In God We Trust,” to an election year, “In Pope We Hope.”

Getting Hot Under the Collar: Between visits with the Pope and other White House visitors President Bush finally has taken a pro-active stance on global warming and the greenhouse effect. I’m not sure if that means he now is in line with almost President and Nobel Peace Prize winner Al Gore. After years of belittling the presidency-loser-by-a-chad, the Bushman has now done a “Whoops. My bad.” Perhaps this is a signal that the soon to be exy Prexy will rethink some of his other positions like stem cell research.

Rollin’ the Dice ‘n Doin’ His Ricin: Dateline Las Vegas. Usually getting busted in Vegas means you either got too many cards at the 21 table or the slots ate your last quarter. But today, 2 ½ months after Ricin was discovered in his room the Feds announced that the puffed Ricin man who rented the room is sooooo busted. Other cluse from the room included a “Ricin for Dummies” equivalent book that showed how to cook up various poisons. Cooking Ricin crispies can not only get you in hot water but get you up to 30 years in the hoosegow. If the concoction kills its creator, as this one nearly did, the sentence is waived.

Liar, Liar, Pants on Fire: CareerBuilder.com has released the five most commonly told lies by employees. They include: “I’d be happy to.... I have no questions... My alarm didn’t go off... I’, not sick, its allergies... and for when you are on deadline, I’m right on schedule.” We have a few to add: “This rubber chicken is the best... That secretary? I barely know her... You are the best boss I’ve ever had... and finally, Didn’t you get my message? I put it right on your desk.”

A little blogging music Maestro… Johnny Paycheck’s “Take This Job and Shove it.”


Dr. Forgot

Money and Politics

If your feet smell and your nose runs, you’re upside down

Running for office: Obama gave one heck of a speech. No known connection but as the O man was talking the DOW was climbing. Both were pleasant surprises. Hillary decided to release her schedule while First Lady. If she wins the election, will be First Laddie? Meanwhile, back at the oasis, Senator McCain spoke to his camel, his troops, and anybody else who would listen. Three candidates, two parties. This reminds me of some of the fuzzy math that was spoken of during past elections.

Nosing around: Meanwhile, Dick Cheney, the “Where’s Waldo” of politics was spotted in Israel. No, it was Oman. Whoops, I mean the West Bank, Wrong, it was Saudi Arabia. Uh, uh, he flew into Turkey. That man moves faster and is seen less than a guilty husband during the holidays.

From the Sunshine State to the Rust Belt: Who is the bad guy here? Let me see if I have this straight. The states of Michigan and Florida, both members of the “Me first” club, wanted to upstage other states by having their primaries early. The Democratic National Committee said that if they do it would not count, but they did anyway. All eight candidates (back in the days before the dropouts dropped out) signed an agreement to ignore the to baddies who had violated the rules. Now the baddies are crying “Foul!” Sir Walter Scott got it right: “Oh what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive.”

Some good news and some bad news: ICE and Homeland security have teamed up to sweep many of those who entered this country illegally back from whence they came. More than 380,000 illegal entrants have been deported in fiscal 2007 compared to 186,000 a year earlier. That is a good thing, right? Maybe yes, maybe no. Reports from around the country show that many menial jobs typically held by illegals are going unfilled. Labor intensive job are among those where shortages exist.

Snip snip. How much will it help?: At this writing the feds just announced an interest rate cut of 0.075%. Within minutes the DOW dropped over 100 points. Not sure where it will end but the free fall continues. We will keep you posted.

A little blogging music Maestro... “Every Little Bit Hurts” by Alicia Keys.

Dr. Forgot

A Pinch of the Blarney

Money Talks. Today it said “Goodbye”

Erin go Braugh: Oh those Irish. Perhaps your image is of elves, or heavy drinkers of green beer, but the cabin crew hostesses aboard Ryan Air stand before you in their demure, button-up blue suits and high neck blouses. Oh, but mention the word “charity” and something other than the wheels begin to come off. The Girls from Ryanair Charity calendar changes the staid prim and proper seat belt chequers into bikini-clad trolley dollies. All proceeds from the calendar go to the children’s charity Angel’s Quest. Hat’s off (and that ain’t all) to the gals.

Luck of the Irish: We’re not sure if NEW York Governor David Paterson is Irish or not but if former Guv Eliot Spitzer was the nude Guv caught with his pants off, DP found his four leaf clover as the New Guv. The old had a sharp tongue, the new has a sharp wit. When asked if he consorted with prostitutes his response was, “Only lobbyists.” Hail to the new state chief. Senator Clinton attended the ceremony but former Guv Spitzer did not. He and Bill were probably planning a boys night out.

Money, money, money… it’s a rich man’s world: Let’s say you were a Bear Sterns employee. You bought all the stock you could in the company because you’re a loyal employee who believes in the company. Let’s further say that one year ago your portfolio of BS (pun intended) stock was valued at $ 1.7 million and you earned $ 120,000 per year as a lower lever bank employee. Then as the TV chef would say, BAM! A sale to JP Morgan Chase. You’re likely out of a job and your $ 1.7 million is now worth $ 20,000 – about two months salary. Ouch!

Wall Street shaking in its booty: Shareholders of JP Morgan Chase stock are as happy as clams. Their stock price soared after the buyout announcement. Some pundits suggested JPM-C should have worn a mask when they stole Bear. But on this day, as many portfolios run red, JP Morgan owners are green with pride. Is it any wonder that the bank whose name springs from the man (Mr. Chase) whose picture graces the $ 10,000 bill (I’ll bet you didn’t know that) should end up with the biggest deal in banking history? Meanwhile, back at the offices of other Wall Street moneyists stocks tumbled. Morgan Stanley dropped 8%, Goldman Sachs fell 13% but later rebounded a bit, and Lehman Brothers sunk 24%. More fallout will no doubt follow.

A little blogging music Maestro... “If I had a Million Dollars” by the Barenaked Ladies.

Dr. Forgot

Money Talks - It Can say, "Goodby"

If #2 Pencils are so popular – why are they still #2?

Really, who IS #1? Seems like everybody wants to be number one. Sports fans and players extend their index finger whenever a play goes their way. Sometimes they extend a different finger of things do not go their way. Vanity license plates can hold the status of being #1. So when a man in Abu Dhabi decided to auction off his car’s #1 tag, folks lined up to bid on it. I’ mean, if the $5 plate brought $ 6.8 million last year (it did), what would #1 bring. ‘Tis a mystery no longer. The plate was purchased for a cool 52.2dirham. Oh, in American money that would be $ 14.3 million. The buyer has his #1 and more cents than sense.

Some people don’t have good cents: We’ve all seen kids throw pennies onto the street. Nobody bothers to pick them up. A movement exists to get rid of the penny (see post of 10/26/07). Readers old enough to remember penny loafers can remember wearing money in their shoes. And every penny arcade had a machine that encased a penny in an aluminum horseshoe that said, “Keep me and you’ll never go broke.”

Some folks actually save pennies. Walter J. Husak is one such person. His penny collection was recently sold. His collection wasn’t very big – 301 pennies in all. Probably not the most impressive of collections. Although it did have so0me rare pennies including one minted in 1793 for two weeks but stopped because of complaints that Lady Liberty looked frightened. Another minted in 1794 had raised stars to discourage counterfeiting. Those two alone brought over $ 632,000. The entire collection of 301 pennies? $ 10.7 million. That averages out to a tad more than $ 35,000 per penny. That ain’t hay.

Up, up, and away: That is where the money went. Silver State Helicopters owner Jerry Airola’s company filed for bankruptcy protection a couple of weeks ago. Airola flew high including financing his own campaign for sheriff – which lost. The difference between Airola and Mitt Romney is that Mitt spent money he had. Jerry exemplified those immortal words of the great philosopher Francis Albert Sinatra who once crooned, “The higher the top the longer the drop.”

Students at the helicopter school were left high and dry and broke after investing as much as $ 70,000 per student to learn about whirlybirds. The company operated schools in 18 states and collected millions in tuition. For now the school remains grounded and flight students learned a difficult economics lesson.

Where’s Andy Sipowicz when we need him? The old NYPD show, still in reruns was a longtime hit. Members of the precinct caught bad guys and had their share of weirdos to deal with. The show is gone but weirdos are still running loose in the Big Apple. A Parks Department employee who did his job on a golf cart went on a rampage running over and killing at least five birds in a park in Lower Manhattan. The 45-year old birdbrain was arrested and charged with reckless endangerment and intentional injury to an animal.

See you next week: Finally, we will be on hiatus until next Thursday or so. See you then. A little blogging music Maestro… Freddy Fender’s “Going Out With the Tide.”

Dr. Forgot

Money - Brilliance and Stupidity

Logic and Illogic

Why didn't I think of that? Today's local newspaper's editorial page had a letter from Las Vegan Bob Hartman. I don't know him, how long he has been in Las Vegas, or anything else about him but I tip my mortarboard to him. Hartman came up with a suggestion to address the budget shortfall in Nevada. As he puts it, "This may be too simple for the Legislature and governor..."

But before we reveal this brilliant plan, let me refresh your memory. Last week the projected budget shortfall was put at $ 564 million. Others have projected less, but let's take that figure.
The Guv has proposed cutting budgets by some 8 percent. That includes budgets of K-12 schools which are already in the bottom 10% in the nation in funding. It also includes cuts to Health and Human Services and Higher Education, both of which are severely underfunded like K-12. Total cuts just among those three entities exceeds $ 231 million plus the loss of another $ 40 million in federal matching funds to HHS if budgets are reduced.

The Guv has refused to raise taxes, has ignored suggestions to tap the "rainy day fund" and has ignored other suggestions. Hartman suggests adding on a $ 1.00 per night surcharge for every room rented. With a statewide room count of about 130,000 and 90% occupancy, the surcharge would yield nearly $ 43 million in a year. A $ 2.00 surcharge would yield nearly $ 86 million. My vote for State Budget Director goes to Mr. Hartman.

NCAA pretends to come clean: We have railed against the NCAA and their predatory practices against athletes in the past. College athletes, especially in the so-called revenue-generating sports of football and basketball are too often Gladiators courted by schools more concerned with the bottom line than the academic best interest of the athlete. The indentured servitude lasts for four or five years during which time an NCAA violation occurs if a scholarship athlete accepts a free t-shirt, meal, or any other so-called "extra benefit" not available to the student body in general.

The payoff for the athlete, says the NCAA is a college degree which is earned in many cases by fewer than half of the Gladiators. The NCAA lives in grand style off the spoils produced by the Gladiators. Plush offices and frequent travel to meetings, fine food in only the best hotels are but a few of the perks enjoyed by NCAA members. TV contracts, licensing agreements and bowl payouts provide hundreds of millions of dollars to NCAA schools and administrations. Coaches earn millions. Players earn peanuts.

A teeny-weeny pushback occurred when four athletes filed a class action lawsuit. But the NCAA, fearing a lawsuit might bring further scrutiny agreed to a settlement of $ 10 million - a drop in the bucket compared to revenue produced by the athletes. NCAA sources show revenue of
$ 564 million for the 2006-07 year. Each of the five BCS Bowl games paid out $ 17 million. The NCAA got off easy. I can hardly wait for the next class action.

A little blogging music maestro.... "Money for Nothing," by Dire Straits.

Dr. Forgot

Predicting the Future

Is it Just a Bunch of Bull?

The old saw that bad news sells newspapers and drives electronic news seems to prevail. If it bleeds it leads. Bad news on the doorstep- I couldn't take one more step. Such is the state of the fourth estate. But dust away the shocking headlines and the Whitehouse banter and the spin doctors and what is left are cold hard facts. Will 2008 find the economy continuing to hurtle down the tubes?

What's that you say? The picture is not all bleak? During the past five years Standard and Poors 500 has rocketed more than 17%. It is true that came on the heels of a 25% increase in 2003 balanced a bit by a mere 3% increase in 2005 and little better in 2007, but that is a five year run of the Bull. That beats the running of the bulls at Pamplona Spain, which only occurs once each year but gets much more coverage because there is much more blood to report about. Many money strategists predict 2008 will also be a good year for the stock market and make a rare six-year run of positive growth.

But how can that be with sub-prime mortgages, credit problems, falling home prices, tighter loan standards, etc. Those folks supposedly in the know are predicting a brighter market in 2008 for several reasons. Much of the bad news cited above is over and things are settling down. Sort of like when FEMA finally arrived in New Orleans. As housing prices appear to be "bottoming out" more families can afford homes and more investors are willing to get back into the swing. Also, central banks around the world, including our own Federal Reserve, will continue to lower interest rates to encourage investing.

With the dollar at an all time low against the Euro and many other currencies, foreign investment is pouring into the US like two-for-one night at the local pizzeria. Cash rich economies such as those in China, Singapore, and the Middle East are snapping up investments in the US. AS the price of oil continues to rise and OPEC countries become awash with cash, they need a place to park it. As global growth continues US companies abroad benefit from the global boom.

Although stock prices rise, many have low valuations, which allow them to rise. Compared to bonds, stocks are considered a good buy. And although we have been CNNed and Foxed, and even Mainstream Media-ed to death with candidates who want to be your president, stocks in election years typically do well, especially in the third and fourth quarters.

Remember, the housing market values have dropped double figures - homes in some areas have lost up to 12% of their values. But during the run-up of the past few years, home market values have doubled and even tripled in some areas. So let's see... a $ 100,000 home rises in value to $ 300,000 over a few years. Then a "housing crisis" causes it to drop in value to $ 260,000 - and the sky is falling? Apparently that's what sells.

A little blogging music maestro.... How about "Bad Moon Rising?"

Dr. Forgot

Stella... STELLLLL-AAAAAHHHH

Believe it or Not

Anybody reading this who has an email address also has people who forward humor to them. Mostly they are jokes that we've heard starting in the seventh grade. Oh yes, there are also the virus warnings that supposedly came out yesterday and were on CNN. Sometimes they even include a note that says, "I checked this out on Snopes and it is really true. Send this to everyone you know..." Or the one about the child who has cancer and wants to get as many business cards as possible, or the one about a police officer who is warning you about "pre-verts," or even, I suppose, post-verts. Finally are the Darwin or Stella Awards, named after Stella something-or-other who burned herself at a McDonald's after dropping her hot coffee in her lap while driving. All of course are hoaxes. I often wonder what drives otherwise rational people to become so gullible when they receive email from somebody who received it from somebody that the recipient doesn't even know. Perhaps the more outlandish the story the more ready somebody is to believe it really is a good cause.

Well, this one is the real McCoy. Pull it up if you wish. It appeared in the Las Vegas Sun newspaper 12/19/07 and has been followed up on by several local radio and TV stations. Let me set the stage: Boulder City is a world away but in fact is just a few miles south of greater Las Vegas on the way to Arizona. Until not too many years ago Boulder City was dry - as in no liquor, and I believe it still observes a ban on gaming. The town was built to house the bosses and their families during the construction of the Hoover Dam and it is still pretty much a cultural company town. The raciest thing that exists is the sign that offers the "Best Hamburgers by a Dam Sight."

Residents are not jaded as they might be in the glitter and glamor of its sister cities to their north. They are more like Mayberry residents, or perhaps folks from Grinnell, Iowa. That is why this story is perfectly believeable to anybody in Southern Nevada who has ever gone to the Boulder City Art Fair, or otherwise spent time in BC.

It happened in the Boulder City AutoZone parking lot. Some legal tender, as in cash American money, started blowing around in the lot. A couple of BC residents chased down the errant cash and walked it back to the car to return it to the driver. Remember, folks, this is not New York, Chicago, or Miami. The finders, not keepers, even joked with the driver about winning a jackpot or looking for the bank's dye bomb in the bag. But the owner of the car was no Chatty Kathy. He scooped up the money and without a word peeled out of the parking lot.

"Odd," thought the resident who had just completed his good deed. So he copied down the car's Arizona license number and phoned the local peace officers who pulled the car over within a few blocks. The cash had come from the car's spare tire -over $ 500,000 worth. Air must be expensive in Arizona. Oh yes, the driver said he had no idea how the cash had gotten there - he had borrowed the car for his vacation. The coppers were born on a Tuesday, but not last Tuesday. The BC police will likely get a windfall. A little blogging music maestro... How about "Goin' To The Bank" by the Commodores? Don't know it? Well, anything by Johnny Paycheck will do.

Dr. Forgot