An Honest Politician is One Who will Stay Bought
My Count Is Bigger Than Yours: Are we seeing a new budding relationship? Is Karl Rove running Hillary Clinton’s campaign or is it just my imagination? The Rove method, which works quite well by the way, is to do something nasty or off kilter, then accuse your opponent of doing it. Case in point is “Low Road to Victory” that the NY Times so eloquently wrote. Hillary denied she’d taken the low road and accused her opponent of doing so. Next up is her most recent statement that she has more popular votes than her opponents. She neglects to mention that her count includes two states that all candidates signed a pledge not to include, and her opponent’s name wasn’t even on the ballot in one of the two. But I’m sure she would not acknowledge the misstatement as a lie, but rather a “creative truth.” Her popular vote count can be found in one of the chapters in her new book, “Bullets Over Bosnia.”
Weddings, Media, and Bush Babies: Hillary has brought Chelsea out of her New York closet to stump for Mom. It is not unusual for politicians to kiss other people’s babies and push their own in front to TV cameras to help them campaign. But Laura Bush and the twins have been doing the TV circuit. Why? Their Dad and hubby is not running. But the Queen and princesses appeared with the King on CNN and other media forums. Jenna, the Bush Baby who was announcing her wedding, made the startling statement that she might not vote for the Republican candidate. Wow!
Not For All the Rice In China: Condi Rice might still be the darling of the current administration but another rice is causing problems worldwide. On the basis of a few slanted media reports a worldwide panic is occurring over the food staple. As the cost of petroleum steadily increases the cost of food delivery does the same. Somehow the rumor mill transferred that information into a food shortage, especially rice, and the Run for the Rices began. Costco and Sam’s slammed the door on hoarders by rationing purchases. But officials assure us that no such shortage exists – yet.
A couple of funnies: We’ve been including way too many serious issues in our blog lately so we’ll conclude today’s with a couple of sillies: Seems that President Bush received word that three Brazilian soldiers had been killed in Iraq. He responded, “I forget. How many in a brazzillion?” The White House bartender has created a drink in honor of Dick Cheney. One shot of Wild Turkey and throw it in the face of an attorney. After Hillary was shown doing a shot and a beer Ted Kennedy switched his support to her. After Barack bowled a 37 he decided he’s better cancel his hockey camp. The three candidates have been arguing over who would be most effective with the 3 a.m. phone call. John McCain says he’s always up at 3, going to the bathroom.
A little blogging music Maestro... Anything by Bruce Springsteen because he’s the Boss.
Dr. Forgot
Thursday, April 24, 2008
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
Politics and Economy
If Two Wrongs Don’t Make a Right, Try Three
The phone rings at 3 a.m. Did Hillary Still win PA?: The Pennsylvanians have spoken. Well, some of them have spoken. Those with a college education voted for Obama. Those without went for Hillary. Young lions: Barack. Old geezers: Hill. The 3 a.m. ad must have worked. Or not. See the spin. Spin candidates, spin. Hill says she now deserves to be the candidate because she won PA and if you count Michigan and Florida (forget that she signed an agreement to ignore them) she is ahead in popular votes. Obie’s camp spins, “Hey, we started 20 30 points behind and closed the gap to 10.” It makes my head spin. I’m reminded of the Shelly Berman monologue: “My tongue is asleep and my teeth itch. It is the morning after the night before.” Oh yes, we were glad to hear that Hillary’s great grandfather played football for Joe Paterno.
Republicans have their own spin: The other team – you know, the one that is not infighting at the moment, must be having a great time watching their adversaries do their best to self destruct. Says one Repub pundit: “Let’s look at the choices, on one side we have our choice of a lawyer married to a lawyer or a lawyer married to a lawyer. On the other side we have a nice old guy married to a beautiful blond who owns a brewery. Is there really any choice?” Who said those Republicans don’t have a sense of humor.
The Case of the Missing $ 20 Million Fence: “Yesterday upon the stair, I met a man who wasn’t there. He wasn’t there again today. Good grief I wish he’d go away.” One of the hot topics during any election year is illegal immigration. Some government genius, Homeland Security boss Michael Chertoff, approved $ 20 million to have Boeing build a fence that wasn’t there. They call it a “virtual” fence and it included towers that let the border patrol know when anybody crossed the border if they should not have. The problem seems to be that illegal crossers can’t see the fence so they ignore it and, well, the fence that isn’t there doesn’t seem to be stopping illegal crossings. So the GAO stepped in and scrapped the process. Mission accomplished.
Psst, Buddy, Can you spare $ 100 for a cup of Joe and a fill up: With gas topping $ 4.00 per gallon in many parts of the country it is not unusual for an empty tank to cost a C-note to fill. So buy a Prius? It will still take over $ 40 for a fill up. Although the candidates were too busy answering “debate” questions about who loves America more, had they been asked about this problem the answers might have been, Hillary: “If you can’t stand the heat get out of the air conditioning.” Barack: “People who cling to their gas guzzlers are bitter.” Johnny Mac: “We’ll be buying expensive gas for the next 100 years.”
A little blogging music Maestro... “Money’s Too Tight to Mention” by Simply Red.
Dr. Forgot
The phone rings at 3 a.m. Did Hillary Still win PA?: The Pennsylvanians have spoken. Well, some of them have spoken. Those with a college education voted for Obama. Those without went for Hillary. Young lions: Barack. Old geezers: Hill. The 3 a.m. ad must have worked. Or not. See the spin. Spin candidates, spin. Hill says she now deserves to be the candidate because she won PA and if you count Michigan and Florida (forget that she signed an agreement to ignore them) she is ahead in popular votes. Obie’s camp spins, “Hey, we started 20 30 points behind and closed the gap to 10.” It makes my head spin. I’m reminded of the Shelly Berman monologue: “My tongue is asleep and my teeth itch. It is the morning after the night before.” Oh yes, we were glad to hear that Hillary’s great grandfather played football for Joe Paterno.
Republicans have their own spin: The other team – you know, the one that is not infighting at the moment, must be having a great time watching their adversaries do their best to self destruct. Says one Repub pundit: “Let’s look at the choices, on one side we have our choice of a lawyer married to a lawyer or a lawyer married to a lawyer. On the other side we have a nice old guy married to a beautiful blond who owns a brewery. Is there really any choice?” Who said those Republicans don’t have a sense of humor.
The Case of the Missing $ 20 Million Fence: “Yesterday upon the stair, I met a man who wasn’t there. He wasn’t there again today. Good grief I wish he’d go away.” One of the hot topics during any election year is illegal immigration. Some government genius, Homeland Security boss Michael Chertoff, approved $ 20 million to have Boeing build a fence that wasn’t there. They call it a “virtual” fence and it included towers that let the border patrol know when anybody crossed the border if they should not have. The problem seems to be that illegal crossers can’t see the fence so they ignore it and, well, the fence that isn’t there doesn’t seem to be stopping illegal crossings. So the GAO stepped in and scrapped the process. Mission accomplished.
Psst, Buddy, Can you spare $ 100 for a cup of Joe and a fill up: With gas topping $ 4.00 per gallon in many parts of the country it is not unusual for an empty tank to cost a C-note to fill. So buy a Prius? It will still take over $ 40 for a fill up. Although the candidates were too busy answering “debate” questions about who loves America more, had they been asked about this problem the answers might have been, Hillary: “If you can’t stand the heat get out of the air conditioning.” Barack: “People who cling to their gas guzzlers are bitter.” Johnny Mac: “We’ll be buying expensive gas for the next 100 years.”
A little blogging music Maestro... “Money’s Too Tight to Mention” by Simply Red.
Dr. Forgot
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
Pennsylvania Primary
Campaign Rhetoric: Baloney disguised as food for thought
Branding, bantering, pandering: Election time is heaven for media types. Newspapers love it because it gives them something to write about rather than the mundane topics such as murders, rapes, robberies, and lootings. TV and radio love it because political ads bolster their budget. Pundits love it because finally they get a few rating points, and wannabe pundits love it because it gives them a chance to get their sometimes not so pretty faces before the camera. Trite expressions are coined by a particular media person and spread like wildfire among their fellow spreaders of gossip. “Branding” is the latest term. Watch for its use among bantering, pandering pundits.
Why we see sound bites instead of issues: Let’s face it. The American public is just not sophisticated. Karl Rove figured that out and put a dodo in office twice with the help of plenty of form and little substance. Sean Hannity, Bill O’Reilly, and the like figured that out and are making millions providing the unwashed remote-toting masses with items that have to do with parsing words rather than examining issues. ABC News produced the George and Charlie Comedy Hour and passed it off as a debate. And the Average American thrived on it. A man’s preacher is more important than the Iraq war. A female candidate’s cry is more important than the economic perils of the country. Whether or not a candidate wears a lapel pin determines his patriotism while 4,000 dead troops are mentioned only in passing and tens of thousands of maimed soldiers and hundreds of thousands of dead Iraqis get hardly a mention. No wonder American Idol feeds the American Idle.
Pillory Hillary, Bury Barry, Attack Mack: That is not to say the candidates can’t get sucked into the eddy of mundane verbosity. Of the three front runners only Senator McCain has the temerity to say “Screw you” to an obnoxious little twerp of a pundit who would ask an out-of-bounds unrelated non-issue question. Hillary would not answer the question but respond with why she is the best candidate running and Obama would respond with a clear cut analysis of the question and a well thought-out logical response. Hannity would say that Obama’s response has racial overtones, and O’Reilly would say that McCain is the only one with cajones (look it up in your Spanish-English dictionary), and Saturday Night Live will spoof Hillary’s answer.
For whom doth lie a victory: Today is the culmination to six weeks of being inundated with news media that has enriched their coffers by millions. Some pundits say if Hillary does not win PA by a substantial margin it is curtains for her. Others say Obama might pull an upset given the vote of the young people. As for Senator McCain, he is probably sitting in a cabana by a swimming pool, lovely young wealthy wife at his side, enjoying a Mai Tai and reading some book or other – perhaps “101 Ways to Ignore the Media.”
A little blogging music Maestro... Today why not do the University of Michigan fight song, “Hail to the Victors!”
Dr. Forgot
Branding, bantering, pandering: Election time is heaven for media types. Newspapers love it because it gives them something to write about rather than the mundane topics such as murders, rapes, robberies, and lootings. TV and radio love it because political ads bolster their budget. Pundits love it because finally they get a few rating points, and wannabe pundits love it because it gives them a chance to get their sometimes not so pretty faces before the camera. Trite expressions are coined by a particular media person and spread like wildfire among their fellow spreaders of gossip. “Branding” is the latest term. Watch for its use among bantering, pandering pundits.
Why we see sound bites instead of issues: Let’s face it. The American public is just not sophisticated. Karl Rove figured that out and put a dodo in office twice with the help of plenty of form and little substance. Sean Hannity, Bill O’Reilly, and the like figured that out and are making millions providing the unwashed remote-toting masses with items that have to do with parsing words rather than examining issues. ABC News produced the George and Charlie Comedy Hour and passed it off as a debate. And the Average American thrived on it. A man’s preacher is more important than the Iraq war. A female candidate’s cry is more important than the economic perils of the country. Whether or not a candidate wears a lapel pin determines his patriotism while 4,000 dead troops are mentioned only in passing and tens of thousands of maimed soldiers and hundreds of thousands of dead Iraqis get hardly a mention. No wonder American Idol feeds the American Idle.
Pillory Hillary, Bury Barry, Attack Mack: That is not to say the candidates can’t get sucked into the eddy of mundane verbosity. Of the three front runners only Senator McCain has the temerity to say “Screw you” to an obnoxious little twerp of a pundit who would ask an out-of-bounds unrelated non-issue question. Hillary would not answer the question but respond with why she is the best candidate running and Obama would respond with a clear cut analysis of the question and a well thought-out logical response. Hannity would say that Obama’s response has racial overtones, and O’Reilly would say that McCain is the only one with cajones (look it up in your Spanish-English dictionary), and Saturday Night Live will spoof Hillary’s answer.
For whom doth lie a victory: Today is the culmination to six weeks of being inundated with news media that has enriched their coffers by millions. Some pundits say if Hillary does not win PA by a substantial margin it is curtains for her. Others say Obama might pull an upset given the vote of the young people. As for Senator McCain, he is probably sitting in a cabana by a swimming pool, lovely young wealthy wife at his side, enjoying a Mai Tai and reading some book or other – perhaps “101 Ways to Ignore the Media.”
A little blogging music Maestro... Today why not do the University of Michigan fight song, “Hail to the Victors!”
Dr. Forgot
Friday, April 18, 2008
Friday's Follies
Politics: Poly (Many) Ticks (Bloodsucking Parasites)
A Debate or a Commercial: We are now a day or two away from the so called "Democratic Nominee Debate” on ABC. Maybe I’m a bit out of touch but I seem to remember the definition of debate as: “A discussion of both sides of an issue.” Issue is the key word here. What ABC News considered issues were more like the George and Charlie Comedy hour. “Does Rev. Wright love America as much as you do?” and “Do you love the American Flag?” Can you say “Packaged for our sponsors?” How about a different term? When a debate of issues is absent issues, it goes one step beyond yellow journalism and becomes an amateur hour that trapped two professionals. Such a blatant commercialization with little substance might work as a radio call in program hosted by a host with slanted points of view, but to tout it as a debate is shameful. ABC News earns a royal flush for that farce.
Happy Birthday Little Adopted Girl: Kids can be cruel. No, kids ARE cruel, and when they grow up they are often still cruel (note the poison that comes from surrogates of candidates). My eldest sibling was born in January. The second was also born in January as was I, the third of four. But the youngest was a surprise to the folks and was born April 18. The older three teased the youngest unmercifully about many things, not the least of which was her April 18 birthday. In fact, we told her that she wasn’t really a member of the family, that she’d been found wandering the streets and adopted. Since she didn’t have a birthday we celebrated her birthday on a national holiday (In case you’ve forgotten, today is the date of Paul Revere’s famous “The British are coming” ride). To make up in small part, “Happy Birthday little sister. Sorry I couldn’t afford a preset.”
FLDS - Finally, Let’s Do Something: The raid on the polygamist complex and subsequent 24-hour cable news coverage gives one pause. The rehearsed responses to reporters’ queries (Question: Are children being married off to older men? Answer: I miss my children) remind me of how politicians and lawyers sidestep direct questions. Perhaps we are seeing some budding (no pun intended) politicians being created here. But on a serious note, memo to the “faithful:” Child abuse is not protected by the U.S. constitution on religious grounds.
Friday quickie News Summary: Some of the sillier items in the news include the five university students who got busted for trying to steal an alligator. Clearly they weren’t University of Florida students. They have a campus full of gators. An Oregon imposter lived with a family for weeks until he was discovered. Actually, the imposter was the family dog who had been accidently switched at the kennel for a lookalike. The first clue was the dog’s “personality change.” Finally, remember the scene in “Back to the Future” when Biff’s car crashed into a load of manure? It really happened in Indiana when a truckload of human excrement overturned on a highway. The investigating officer said, “I hate it when this happens.”
A little blogging music Maestro... What else but Lynyrd Skynyrd’s “That Smell.”
Dr. Forgot
A Debate or a Commercial: We are now a day or two away from the so called "Democratic Nominee Debate” on ABC. Maybe I’m a bit out of touch but I seem to remember the definition of debate as: “A discussion of both sides of an issue.” Issue is the key word here. What ABC News considered issues were more like the George and Charlie Comedy hour. “Does Rev. Wright love America as much as you do?” and “Do you love the American Flag?” Can you say “Packaged for our sponsors?” How about a different term? When a debate of issues is absent issues, it goes one step beyond yellow journalism and becomes an amateur hour that trapped two professionals. Such a blatant commercialization with little substance might work as a radio call in program hosted by a host with slanted points of view, but to tout it as a debate is shameful. ABC News earns a royal flush for that farce.
Happy Birthday Little Adopted Girl: Kids can be cruel. No, kids ARE cruel, and when they grow up they are often still cruel (note the poison that comes from surrogates of candidates). My eldest sibling was born in January. The second was also born in January as was I, the third of four. But the youngest was a surprise to the folks and was born April 18. The older three teased the youngest unmercifully about many things, not the least of which was her April 18 birthday. In fact, we told her that she wasn’t really a member of the family, that she’d been found wandering the streets and adopted. Since she didn’t have a birthday we celebrated her birthday on a national holiday (In case you’ve forgotten, today is the date of Paul Revere’s famous “The British are coming” ride). To make up in small part, “Happy Birthday little sister. Sorry I couldn’t afford a preset.”
FLDS - Finally, Let’s Do Something: The raid on the polygamist complex and subsequent 24-hour cable news coverage gives one pause. The rehearsed responses to reporters’ queries (Question: Are children being married off to older men? Answer: I miss my children) remind me of how politicians and lawyers sidestep direct questions. Perhaps we are seeing some budding (no pun intended) politicians being created here. But on a serious note, memo to the “faithful:” Child abuse is not protected by the U.S. constitution on religious grounds.
Friday quickie News Summary: Some of the sillier items in the news include the five university students who got busted for trying to steal an alligator. Clearly they weren’t University of Florida students. They have a campus full of gators. An Oregon imposter lived with a family for weeks until he was discovered. Actually, the imposter was the family dog who had been accidently switched at the kennel for a lookalike. The first clue was the dog’s “personality change.” Finally, remember the scene in “Back to the Future” when Biff’s car crashed into a load of manure? It really happened in Indiana when a truckload of human excrement overturned on a highway. The investigating officer said, “I hate it when this happens.”
A little blogging music Maestro... What else but Lynyrd Skynyrd’s “That Smell.”
Dr. Forgot
Thursday, April 17, 2008
Lost Wages in Las Vegas
Las Vegas Variety
A Day at the DMV: Today we are going to talk about life and visiting in Las Vegas. Today I had to go to the dreaded DMV to register a car. Normally I’m savvy enough to register online and avoid the crush. Nevada provides a pretty hip set of options of not only renewing your car’s registration but renewing your driver’s license. But today I had to go to the DMV. It is on my least liked things to do list, right below getting a shot and having a root canal. The lines are horrible, the customers are frustrated and often short tempered and often slobs. The employees are nearly always on the defensive after being shouted at, threatened, and even spat upon. So with trepidation I entered the DMV, dodging the petition signature requesters. The information line took about 15 minutes to negotiate and I was out in 30 minutes flat. A speed record.
A Fluke or a Sign: I could not help but notice the emptiness of the DMV. Could it have been because it was Thursday around noon? Could it have been because it was the middle of the month? A fluke perhaps? Or could the reason have to do with the economy? MGM Grand just laid off a gaggle of people, restaurants seem to be not as full, those who work for tips complain that that tips are getting smaller. The days of 5,000 – 6,000 new residents per month moving to the Valley of the Dollars may well be behind this fair city.
Shuffle Into a Deal: The slowdown may also have benefits. Every zig has its zag and every ping has its pong. I remember after 9/11 the economy slowed to a crawl and hotels offered fantastic deals. Mrs. Dr. Forgot and I stayed at the Ritz Carlton for a week including meals, free valet parking and an upgraded room for about $ 500.00. Things aren’t that bad but The Wall Street Journal reports that deals are abundant along the Strip. Gamblers are becoming more frugal, conventioneers are cutting their stays short, and leisure travelers are staying home. The result is room rates cut up to 25%. Now is the time.
You’ll Never Take Me Alive Copper: As the economy tightens people become more creative in ways to survive. Copper theft from homes under construction or abandoned foreclosures or even public sources such as light poles and school air conditioners have become rampant. The thefts have cost the city millions in repair plus the danger posed when streetlamps are out. During a recent theft of 30,000 feet of copper the thief stole a city truck to transport it. Mayor Oscar went to court as a victim advocate The crook got 18 months and a big fine. The Mayor also suggested that taggers who deface public property have their thumbs cut off. You’ve gotta’ love Mayor Oscar.
A little blogging music Maestro... One more time.... Elvis doing, “Viva Las Vegas!”
Dr. Forgot
A Day at the DMV: Today we are going to talk about life and visiting in Las Vegas. Today I had to go to the dreaded DMV to register a car. Normally I’m savvy enough to register online and avoid the crush. Nevada provides a pretty hip set of options of not only renewing your car’s registration but renewing your driver’s license. But today I had to go to the DMV. It is on my least liked things to do list, right below getting a shot and having a root canal. The lines are horrible, the customers are frustrated and often short tempered and often slobs. The employees are nearly always on the defensive after being shouted at, threatened, and even spat upon. So with trepidation I entered the DMV, dodging the petition signature requesters. The information line took about 15 minutes to negotiate and I was out in 30 minutes flat. A speed record.
A Fluke or a Sign: I could not help but notice the emptiness of the DMV. Could it have been because it was Thursday around noon? Could it have been because it was the middle of the month? A fluke perhaps? Or could the reason have to do with the economy? MGM Grand just laid off a gaggle of people, restaurants seem to be not as full, those who work for tips complain that that tips are getting smaller. The days of 5,000 – 6,000 new residents per month moving to the Valley of the Dollars may well be behind this fair city.
Shuffle Into a Deal: The slowdown may also have benefits. Every zig has its zag and every ping has its pong. I remember after 9/11 the economy slowed to a crawl and hotels offered fantastic deals. Mrs. Dr. Forgot and I stayed at the Ritz Carlton for a week including meals, free valet parking and an upgraded room for about $ 500.00. Things aren’t that bad but The Wall Street Journal reports that deals are abundant along the Strip. Gamblers are becoming more frugal, conventioneers are cutting their stays short, and leisure travelers are staying home. The result is room rates cut up to 25%. Now is the time.
You’ll Never Take Me Alive Copper: As the economy tightens people become more creative in ways to survive. Copper theft from homes under construction or abandoned foreclosures or even public sources such as light poles and school air conditioners have become rampant. The thefts have cost the city millions in repair plus the danger posed when streetlamps are out. During a recent theft of 30,000 feet of copper the thief stole a city truck to transport it. Mayor Oscar went to court as a victim advocate The crook got 18 months and a big fine. The Mayor also suggested that taggers who deface public property have their thumbs cut off. You’ve gotta’ love Mayor Oscar.
A little blogging music Maestro... One more time.... Elvis doing, “Viva Las Vegas!”
Dr. Forgot
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
Money Makes the World Go Round
The Buck Doesn’t Even Slow Down Here
We Have All the Money We Need For Life: Provided we die tomorrow. When Europe first rolled out the Euro there were hues and cries that it was a mere pittance against the mighty Dollar. At one point it was worth around 80 cents. My how the worm, if not the Euro, has turned – it is now worth $ 1.60. That means it will cost $ 1.60 to buy one Euro. Since Euros are probably not the preferred currency in your neighborhood Wal-Mart, 99-cent store, or even Starbucks that economic fact might not make you quiver. The British Pound is worth nearly U.S. $ 2.00. If you’re planning a European trip, brace yourself.
Spiritual Fruits & Religious Nuts: The Pope is Roamin’ the streets of D.C. Papal representatives stress that this is not a political trip. Right! How many other dignitaries have been picked up at the airport by the President? The Pontiff’s visit to White House during the season of presidential campaigning has caused some pundits to wonder if the goal is to make His Holiness an honorary Republican. The so–called “Catholic vote” typically goes to the Democratic candidate. Some say the timing of the visit changes the White House motto from “In God We Trust,” to an election year, “In Pope We Hope.”
Getting Hot Under the Collar: Between visits with the Pope and other White House visitors President Bush finally has taken a pro-active stance on global warming and the greenhouse effect. I’m not sure if that means he now is in line with almost President and Nobel Peace Prize winner Al Gore. After years of belittling the presidency-loser-by-a-chad, the Bushman has now done a “Whoops. My bad.” Perhaps this is a signal that the soon to be exy Prexy will rethink some of his other positions like stem cell research.
Rollin’ the Dice ‘n Doin’ His Ricin: Dateline Las Vegas. Usually getting busted in Vegas means you either got too many cards at the 21 table or the slots ate your last quarter. But today, 2 ½ months after Ricin was discovered in his room the Feds announced that the puffed Ricin man who rented the room is sooooo busted. Other cluse from the room included a “Ricin for Dummies” equivalent book that showed how to cook up various poisons. Cooking Ricin crispies can not only get you in hot water but get you up to 30 years in the hoosegow. If the concoction kills its creator, as this one nearly did, the sentence is waived.
Liar, Liar, Pants on Fire: CareerBuilder.com has released the five most commonly told lies by employees. They include: “I’d be happy to.... I have no questions... My alarm didn’t go off... I’, not sick, its allergies... and for when you are on deadline, I’m right on schedule.” We have a few to add: “This rubber chicken is the best... That secretary? I barely know her... You are the best boss I’ve ever had... and finally, Didn’t you get my message? I put it right on your desk.”
A little blogging music Maestro… Johnny Paycheck’s “Take This Job and Shove it.”
Dr. Forgot
We Have All the Money We Need For Life: Provided we die tomorrow. When Europe first rolled out the Euro there were hues and cries that it was a mere pittance against the mighty Dollar. At one point it was worth around 80 cents. My how the worm, if not the Euro, has turned – it is now worth $ 1.60. That means it will cost $ 1.60 to buy one Euro. Since Euros are probably not the preferred currency in your neighborhood Wal-Mart, 99-cent store, or even Starbucks that economic fact might not make you quiver. The British Pound is worth nearly U.S. $ 2.00. If you’re planning a European trip, brace yourself.
Spiritual Fruits & Religious Nuts: The Pope is Roamin’ the streets of D.C. Papal representatives stress that this is not a political trip. Right! How many other dignitaries have been picked up at the airport by the President? The Pontiff’s visit to White House during the season of presidential campaigning has caused some pundits to wonder if the goal is to make His Holiness an honorary Republican. The so–called “Catholic vote” typically goes to the Democratic candidate. Some say the timing of the visit changes the White House motto from “In God We Trust,” to an election year, “In Pope We Hope.”
Getting Hot Under the Collar: Between visits with the Pope and other White House visitors President Bush finally has taken a pro-active stance on global warming and the greenhouse effect. I’m not sure if that means he now is in line with almost President and Nobel Peace Prize winner Al Gore. After years of belittling the presidency-loser-by-a-chad, the Bushman has now done a “Whoops. My bad.” Perhaps this is a signal that the soon to be exy Prexy will rethink some of his other positions like stem cell research.
Rollin’ the Dice ‘n Doin’ His Ricin: Dateline Las Vegas. Usually getting busted in Vegas means you either got too many cards at the 21 table or the slots ate your last quarter. But today, 2 ½ months after Ricin was discovered in his room the Feds announced that the puffed Ricin man who rented the room is sooooo busted. Other cluse from the room included a “Ricin for Dummies” equivalent book that showed how to cook up various poisons. Cooking Ricin crispies can not only get you in hot water but get you up to 30 years in the hoosegow. If the concoction kills its creator, as this one nearly did, the sentence is waived.
Liar, Liar, Pants on Fire: CareerBuilder.com has released the five most commonly told lies by employees. They include: “I’d be happy to.... I have no questions... My alarm didn’t go off... I’, not sick, its allergies... and for when you are on deadline, I’m right on schedule.” We have a few to add: “This rubber chicken is the best... That secretary? I barely know her... You are the best boss I’ve ever had... and finally, Didn’t you get my message? I put it right on your desk.”
A little blogging music Maestro… Johnny Paycheck’s “Take This Job and Shove it.”
Dr. Forgot
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
Ticks Tax Talks
Golf and taxes: Drive hard to get to the green. End up in a hole.
Truth doesn’t hurt except on a 1040: Today is the day. Poor Richard’s Almanac 2008: The taxman cometh. Behind every successful man stands a good woman and the IRS. One takes all the credit and the other takes all the cash. A harp is a piano after taxes. Being poor is no guarantee you won’t be audited. If the meek inherit the earth I’m sure it will put them in the 40% tax bracket. Can you imagine Patrick Henry alive today? He’d see real taxation without representation. Finally on this topic, remember the old saw, “A penny earned is a penny taxed.”
The old high school reunion: Every five or ten or perhaps 20 years many Americans go back home to attend their high school reunion. We are always shocked at how old everybody else is looking, how the high school foxes now look like armadillos and the former geeks make you wonder why you didn’t notice them in high school. A friend of mine tells me that at his reunion his wife commented on a frumpy looking gal sitting alone at a nearby table drinking like a fish. His wife asked who she was and my friend said she was an old flame of his who took up drinking after they’d broken up and had rarely seen a sober day since. The wife commented, “My God! Who would think a person would go on celebrating so long?”
Dad, Can I drive the Popemobile: Seems like “W” doesn’t have much to do around the White House these days. Johnny Mac isn’t exactly bombarding him with requests for appearances at fundraisers and he can only go over to Putin’s house to play so often before he wears out his welcome. So Uncle Dick or Condi or whoever is in charge of such things had a great idea when they told him to take the limo and go pick up the Pope at the airport. I wonder if he plans to look into Pope Benedict’s eyes and see his soul.
Records are made to be broken: Today is tax day but that is not the only reason to say “Ouch!” At this writing oil prices have set another record at $ 113+ per barrel. That is neither light nor sweet but it makes a fellow want to say something crude about oil. Not only will that cause another jump at the pump but the bump will trump airfares. Stock prices will slump. Portfolios will dump. Employees will grump. We’re being played for a chump. Meanwhile Exxon and their pals continue to stump for more tax breaks.
Up up and Away: Southwest Airlines looks like it will move from the 6th to the 5th largest U.S. Airline without adding a passenger. If Delta and Northwest merge as expected, there will be one less company to rank. The merger will catapult the new airline (Nelta? Deltest?) to the #1 slot. Passengers will now have a much larger ogre to abuse them.
A little blogging music Maestro… anything from Air Supply would work.
Dr. Forgot
Truth doesn’t hurt except on a 1040: Today is the day. Poor Richard’s Almanac 2008: The taxman cometh. Behind every successful man stands a good woman and the IRS. One takes all the credit and the other takes all the cash. A harp is a piano after taxes. Being poor is no guarantee you won’t be audited. If the meek inherit the earth I’m sure it will put them in the 40% tax bracket. Can you imagine Patrick Henry alive today? He’d see real taxation without representation. Finally on this topic, remember the old saw, “A penny earned is a penny taxed.”
The old high school reunion: Every five or ten or perhaps 20 years many Americans go back home to attend their high school reunion. We are always shocked at how old everybody else is looking, how the high school foxes now look like armadillos and the former geeks make you wonder why you didn’t notice them in high school. A friend of mine tells me that at his reunion his wife commented on a frumpy looking gal sitting alone at a nearby table drinking like a fish. His wife asked who she was and my friend said she was an old flame of his who took up drinking after they’d broken up and had rarely seen a sober day since. The wife commented, “My God! Who would think a person would go on celebrating so long?”
Dad, Can I drive the Popemobile: Seems like “W” doesn’t have much to do around the White House these days. Johnny Mac isn’t exactly bombarding him with requests for appearances at fundraisers and he can only go over to Putin’s house to play so often before he wears out his welcome. So Uncle Dick or Condi or whoever is in charge of such things had a great idea when they told him to take the limo and go pick up the Pope at the airport. I wonder if he plans to look into Pope Benedict’s eyes and see his soul.
Records are made to be broken: Today is tax day but that is not the only reason to say “Ouch!” At this writing oil prices have set another record at $ 113+ per barrel. That is neither light nor sweet but it makes a fellow want to say something crude about oil. Not only will that cause another jump at the pump but the bump will trump airfares. Stock prices will slump. Portfolios will dump. Employees will grump. We’re being played for a chump. Meanwhile Exxon and their pals continue to stump for more tax breaks.
Up up and Away: Southwest Airlines looks like it will move from the 6th to the 5th largest U.S. Airline without adding a passenger. If Delta and Northwest merge as expected, there will be one less company to rank. The merger will catapult the new airline (Nelta? Deltest?) to the #1 slot. Passengers will now have a much larger ogre to abuse them.
A little blogging music Maestro… anything from Air Supply would work.
Dr. Forgot
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