Tuesday, March 11, 2008

Love American Style

Sin Is Attractive Because Wages Are Paid Immediately

The Guv’s hooker was a looker
: Good ole Client 9. Did he use Love Potion #9? He asked what his gal looked like and was told she was pretty. For $ 4,300 she’d better be. To resign or not to… that seems to be the question. Hillary prays he does not (he’s a Super-delegate pledged to her). Obama hopes he does (the replacement will pledge to the Barrackster). Rumors have it the First Lady of Noo Jork has wrapped yellow crime scene tape around his waist. I guess that would be considered Capitol punishment

Who’s Number one?: The CDC (Center for Disease Control) released a study that cited statistics on STDs, (Sexually Transmitted Diseases) which showed that one in four teen-aged girls are infected. This is a sad fact. The U.S. is number one in many areas but does not care to have this statistic amongst the bragging rights.

The Professor and Maryann: Here on Gilligan’s Isle. The popular comedy series from about 1,000 years ago starred Bob Denver as Gilligan and among others, Dawn Wells as Maryann, the pure, sweet girl-next-door character who was cast opposite sexpot Tina Louise. We always wondered how the Professor was able to invent all manner of life sustaining contraptions but could not figure out how to patch their boat and get them off the island. We should have wondered what they smoked in their spare time. Bob Denver was busted for smoking grass numerous times and sweet little Maryann was recently busted in Idaho for smoking while driving. She copped a plea.

Remember Voodoo politics: Ah that burning question on the lips of every candidate and Florida and Michigan delegate: “Who do the Voodoo that you do so well?” All the doo doo about the do-over would put Rover in the clover. But the manure spread by both candidates over whether or not to redo the primary or caucus in the states begs this question: “Didn’t ALL candidates sign an agreement to ignore the two states that broke the rules?”

Who shot the ice cream lady and why: Remember a couple of weeks ago when a Henderson ice cream couple got in trouble with the cops? Hubby was pulled over for speeding and the cops called his wife. I’ve been pulled over for speeding a few times and nobody ever called my wife. But it wasn’t in Henderson. Maybe that’s the difference. Anyhow, wifey arrived and argued with the cops and was shot. Cops claim she was threatening them. Hubby said she was on the ground when it happened. An independent autopsy showed she was on the ground. Whoops. I smell a lawsuit if the lawyers have time between Endoscopy centers.

Here’s a tip - No outrageous behavior: The extortion that went on at LAX and perhaps other night clubs, as documented in the Las Vegas Sun tells a lot about the young generation. Back in the 1800s when I was a young bachelor in Las Vegas the closest thing to clubs were lounges and the drinks were free.

A little blogging music Maestro... “Memories.”

Dr. Forgot

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